#AVabc: The AVcrumb Techies

The Gashlycrumb Tinies
The Gashlycrumb Tinies feature black & white illustrations by author Edward Gorey.

Every week, the #avtweeps community on Twitter plays a fun little game known as #avhashtags.  A topic is chosen and tweeted out from the official account and then Twitterers far and wide can use the hashtag to exercise their creativity and humor, coming up with responses to that hashtag.  To honor the birth of Theodore Geisel (better known as Dr. Seuss), this week’s avhashtag topic was #AVabc.  Folks contributed individual letters, some more than one. I, on the other hand, was bitten by the bug and contributed an entire alphabet.  At the urging of several tweeps, I’m sharing my entry here.

Now, I know that the topic was chosen to honor Dr. Suess, but when I heard the topic, I was more inspired by The Gashlycrumb Tinies, an abecedarian written and illustrated by Edward Gorey, first published in 1963. The book was written as a sarcastic parody of happy, shiny children’s stories and tells the story of 26 children (one for each letter of the alphabet) and the way they died suddenly (“A is for Amy who fell down the stairs. B is for Basil, assaulted by bears….)

My attempts to match Mr. Gorey’s dactylic rhyming scheme fell short on a few couplets, but I’m inordinately proud of this bit of AV ridiculousness.  So, without further ado (and with many apologies to Edward Gorey!), I now present “The AVcrumb Techies”

A is for Audio, sounds we all hear.

B is for Bandwidth, a resource most dear.

C is for Crosstalk, interference that blows.

D is for Digital, when it’s all ones and oh’s.

E is for Ethernet, how networks talk.

F is for Fiber, glass cables that rock.

G is for Gain, how screens concentrate light.

H is for Hotspots, they’re just too darned bright.

I is for Infocomm, the show where we see it all.

J is for Jack, where we plug in to the wall.

K is for Keystone, when your pic just ain’t square.

L is for Lavalier, mics you can wear.

M is for Matrix, switch every-which-way.

N is for Native, the best res for display.

O is for OLED, a new flat bendy screen.

P is for Pixel, dots of blue, red or green.

Q is for Quality, a goal we all share.

R is for Reverb, sound bouncing through air.

S is for Scaler, making images big or small.

T is for Telepresence, a ‘like you are there’ call.

U is for Unicast, when you stream one to one.

V is for Video, tech that’s shiny and fun.

W is for Woofers, for low sounds to play.

X is for XGA resolution display.

Y is for Y/C, s-video’s technical label.

Z is for Zoom to get closer than you’re able.

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